Here's my story. The reason behind my designs. The reason behind my whole life.
(Me, clearing my throat, waiting for you to run.) *ahem*
Several years ago, I had developed an addiction.
My addiction was to the word "victim." I was so accustomed to sadness in my life, that I let it define me. It started off innocently enough. I would bring up my sufferings at neighborhood parks and scare the local children. Occasionally I would disperse a party by bringing up sad subjects when people were trying to celebrate. (Hurt people have filters that don't work too well.) Eventually one of my friends decided that she couldn't be my friend anymore; I was too broken. Being hurt has a domino effect.
My sufferings were real. Five miscarriages all in a row. Five babies I will never meet.
And then a job loss and the divorce of my parents. All within years so close together that they didn't have time to cast a shadow. Waves of sorrow.
My body swelled and shrunk. My pregnancy hormones rose and dropped.
My family felt shaped by shards.
I cried so much that one day I woke up and said, "I've had enough crying, thank you. I won't be defined by crying and breaking up parties anymore."Or maybe I said, "Sweet mercy, I am only thirty some years old. I cannot do this the rest of my life."
In any case, I reached into the recesses of my brain and remembered that I loved art. And then I took a page from my marketing background and squished all my experiences together, the same way my 4 year old takes all her new colored Play-Doh® and makes a big rainbow lump. I made my first calendar.
I gave it away as Christmas presents. I showed my friends. Some friends asked to buy some. So I printed extra.
The next year some more friends asked for the calendars.
And this year... this year I printed more. I did so in faith that there are other people out there who might enjoy a calendar made from a stay at home mother who loves designing. Or from a woman who will not let suffering define her. Or from a lady who has a dream to take the little minutes of life and turn them into something tangible and joyful.
The message of the art is this: You get to choose your story. You get to choose what defines you. And please, for the love of life, don't define yourself by sorrow and loss and ashes.
This calendar is for every occasion, for every person.
For the lonely and the life-full.
For the wanderlusters and the hearth-fires-burningers. (I'm sure that's a word.)
For those who mourn and those who laugh.
Enjoy--
www.sweetmercydesign.com
