New Happiness

If you read his resume, you would think you were meeting the golden child of marketing.

He worked for BP for ten years.
He attended, arguably, the best marketing school in the United States: Kellogg.
He worked for Google. It took 7 months of interviewing to land the job, but he got it.
He worked for Navistar in their International Trucks division. He made them money hand over fist.

So why is a man who is amply qualified to market ice cubes to eskimos without work?
We have asked that question for 180 days. Six months. Half a year.
Why?

Because, quite simply, God allowed it to be.

And during this time of unknown, God has allowed it to be a time of incubation, to develop in us new standards of living and loving and knowing.

When we have lacked the energy or enthusiasm to lead with any strength, others have stepped up. We have allowed ourselves to be weak, to serve with the strength God provides; sometimes that strength is but a mite.

We have held our heads strong when our daughter told a friend, "Sorry, my parents said we can't do anything money related right now." Which is a little hard for a parent to hear. But we smiled at her young acceptance.

We are deliberate.

We are pruned.

We are weary but focused.

We are living on a spiritual dimension which can only be called faith.

Because money is not our God. Money is a tool used to serve people, but it is not God.

We are recipients of wonderful things which we did not earn and do not deserve because people have opened their hearts and lives to us.

We see a smaller community at work. We see our wonderful, flexing, growing, redeeming city of Aurora. We see small, local businesses pushing for life.

We see time as a gift, a resource.

We have taken up bowling as a family. Because it is winter and because ALL of us can participate.

We have taken each day, accepted its plate, eaten its bread and digested its simplicity.

I'm not talking about a financial simplicity. Not necessarily.

I'm speaking of me accepting my role as Home Manager. As Mother. As Friend.

I'm speaking of me seeing my mind as a field in which I can sow bad thoughts or life giving thoughts.

I'm taking care of my home and my family and my kitchen and my body and my mind in a much more efficient way than I ever thought imaginable. Because I am focused and pruned and made new.

I don't want to go back to my former life 6 months ago. I want my husband employed, yes. But I don't want the excess mind chatter.

When an apple tree is pruned, it is so that the fruit will be stronger and bigger and better.

When this pruning is finished, I look forward to its results.

Because I'm already seeing some good, good stuff.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm enjoying playing blocks with my daughter while listening to Chicago jazz. I'm baking happiness.