Of Numbers and Letters

To my Daughters:

In the course of life you will be assigned buckets of numbers.

You have your social security numbers.
Bank account numbers.
Birthdates.
Birth weights.
IQ.
School ID numbers.


There's your age and your income and your phone numbers. You'll see numbers whiz past your life like the digits on the gasoline pump, rising and flying and growing.

Everywhere you go, people will ask you for your credit card number. You, in turn, will grant them your credit card number in exchange for more numbers.


Friends will ask you for numbers in order to determine what time to meet you for coffee. You'll exchange phone numbers and clock numbers ("Is 3pm okay?") in order to meet.


There's nothing wrong with numbers in and of themselves. For all I know one of you might become an accountant and numbers will be your livelihood. I'm not discounting the importance of numbers.

But I will say this: If you feel that your name-- you know the one that I carefully selected with your father?-- If your name starts to become erased and the letters in your name begin to become replaced with grade point averages or income levels, then you'll know that numbers are ruling your life.


Your name was given to you at birth. Whether you like your name or not doesn't matter. What DOES matter is that the letters that make up your name reflect what you do, who you are and what choices you make. When your friends string together that special combination of letters that forms your name and they smile upon hearing it, then you know you're on the right path.


I'm not sure why numbers win so often. Within minutes people can size others up by their weight, their income level and their material possessions. Perhaps it's easier to get to know someone by adding numbers or subtracting numbers rather than getting to know the person. I'm just not sure.

I do know that when I let my life be defined by riches, I felt impoverished in soul. And when I let God take my income to places I'd never considered before, I was glad of heart. This is one reason I am a stay at home mother. You two enrich my life more than all the acclaim I could receive in a corporate setting.



When you meet a new person and they introduce themselves to you, repeat their name three times in your head. Say it out loud to them as well. Say, "Wow, Lisa, it's so nice to meet you." And then as your friendship grows, watch how they make a simple arrangement of letters turn into a life, into choices... hopefully good ones.


If someone wants to compete numerically with you, disqualify yourself as soon as possible.
It's never worth it.
Not for respect.
Not for money.
Not for boys or friends or things.
Nothing.

Do not be ashamed of the numbers in your life.
Don't be ashamed of weight. Don't ever talk badly about your body.
Even after giving birth. Scratch that-- ESPECIALLY after giving birth.
Don't be ashamed of your height. You are both going to be taller than me. Hold your head high.
Any number that is associated with you, beam brighter than those digits.


Become more than numbers.
Be letters.
Be yourself.